Guilty Pleasure
Why does material good bring me so much pleasure and satisfaction? I wondered this when I recently went to Akihabara and found myself facing a life crisis. To buy or not to buy the extremely “kawaii” Yugioh! figurines. To buy the whole set or just one? If I bought only one, I couldn’t pick which one I would get, and if I bought the whole set, I was sure to get every character from the set. After much dilemma I ended up buying the whole set and, even though I was submerged with guilt as to how much of a waste of money this was, a deep feeling of satisfaction lay in me. Even though I am embarrassed to admit it, this was nothing less then pure happiness. The feeling any accomplished collector would get from now owning every missing piece of the collection. Every time I unwrapped a new character from the box, my heart would go in a wild frenzy as I would take my sweet time admiring every detail from these beautiful figurines. I feel good every time I look at them.
I cannot explain why “stuff” such as my new Yugioh figurine set makes me so happy. I can say though, that it’s not only the material form but the sentimental and nostalgic memory attached to everyone of my beloved characters that brings me all this happiness. How they’ve come about, in my wild imagination, helping me through rough times and how they’ve always been there for me. I know this might not make any sense, especially not from a 21 years old, but I love these characters. I’ve built with them a relationship that cannot really be explained through word. They exist for me. They exist in my mind and heart. I don’t think I can ever make anyone understand this unless, just like me, someone has this same strange love for characters that do not exist (at least, not our world.)
